For LAC

Could you make a tutorial/guide that will help people (and retards) for full standard conformance of their programs please?

STEP 1: STRETCH!

STEP 2: DO SUM LITE CALISTHENICS!

STEP 3: REED DA FUKIN STANDARD!

STEP 4: GET INTO SHITTY ARGUMENTS DAT GO NOWHERE ABOUT DA FUKIN STANDARD WITH ALL DA SKINNY, NERDY AUTISTS DAT U FIND ON FORTUNE.ORG/G/. OR U KUD ARGUE WIT A BUNCH OF INDIAN TEECHERZ -- IF U GET LUCKY U MITE FIND ONE OR TWO ON YAHOO ANSERZ. INDIANZ LUV SAYIN YAHOO SO DEY ALL SWARM AROUND DAT WEBSITE.

STEP 5: REPEAT STEPZ 3 AND 4 UNTIL U MANAGE TO PROVE SOME1 RONG (JUST KIDDING, DAT AINT FUKIN POSSIBLE WEN UR TALKIN 2 RETOIDS WHO AINT RED DA FUKIN STANDARD N R CONVINCED DAT DEYRE DA BEZT PROGRAMMAZ IN DA WURLD)

STEP 6: WRITE PROGRAMZ WIT UR NEW FOUND BELIEF DAT UR DA BEZT PROGRAMMER IN DA FUKIN WURLD

OR U CUD SKIP DOSE FUKIN STEPZ, FIGURE OUT WAT PLATFORMS U GOTTA SUPPORT, N WORK TOWARD WRITING CODE DAT WORKS ON ALL OF EM. U GOTTA FACE IT -- ANY PROGRAM WORTH WRITIN PROBABLY KANT BE WRITTEN 100% IN PORTABLE, STANDARD C. WRITE DA PARTS DAT CAN BE WRITTEN LIKE DAT AS PORTABLY AS U CAN, AND SEPARATE DA PORTABLE CODE FROM DA NON-PORTABLE CODE BY POPPIN EM IN DIFFERENT MODULES. DA INTERFACES 2 DOSE MODULES (THINK HEDER FILES, JUNIOR) SHUD BE AS PORTABLE AS U KAN MAKE EM.

WAT U NEED IS A GOOD BOOK ON PROGRAMMING PRACTICE LIKE TPOP. DONT LET DA FUKIN STANDARD ROT UR BRAIN LIKE IT DID MINE, OTHERWISE ULL BE LIKE DIRTY OLD JOSEPH DA UNIX HAKKER, N ULL BE SITTING DER ON ##C ON FREENODE ALL DAY YELLIN AT PEOPLE 4 ASSUMIN DAT CHAR_BIT == 8. OR WORSE, ULL BE SITTIN ON DIS FUKIN BORED ALL DAY YELLIN AT ALL DA FUKIN STAK BOIZ

BUT SERIOZLY, KEEP A COPY OF DA STANDARD HANDY N USE IT WENEVER U AINT SURE ABOUT SOMETHING. NEVER HURTZ TO RUN A LINT (BUT DONT TAKE ITZ FUKIN MESSAGES 2 SERIOUSLY), OR COMPILE UR CODE WITH WARNING FLAGZ EITHER.