Is RMS still Alive?

Is RMS alive?
RMS hated the BSD License.
TodayRMS treats the GPL as if it were the BSD License.

RMS sued cisco and won a hefty settlement for GPL violation of GCC. A settlement he could live the rest of his life on
TodayRMS won't sue Grsecurity for GPL violation of GCC.

RMS wasn't ascared of anything, would fight forever.
TodayRMS gives every excuse, for years and years, to take no action.

RMS was vocal, always arguing and fighting; showing the Jewish Revolutionary Spirit. Always going /Forward/
TodayRMS is quiet as a mouse; like an employed white person.

RMS never backed down and never apologized for his beliefs and opionions.
TodayRMS deletes and apologises for "pedo opinions" and reverses them saying he was wrong. Then deletes them from his website.

RMS was not a fan of women's ways: often criticizing their "look at me I'm having a baby" announcements on his techical forum. (a mailing list as said venue)
TodayRMS is a friend of women: even though they won't "let" him fk them.

RMS was a Zealot on privacy. Free software was for the user; not the developer.
TodayRMS is fine with "free software" phoning home (see: Audacity), no problem whatsoever: within the text of the license. Free software may phone home if the developer wants it to. Pingbacks are fine. For a desktop program that doesn't need any networking. TodayRMS think's that's fine.


RMS was a fat fk in a red shirt.
TodayRMS is sometimes a skinnyish fk in a red shirt and a giant GIANT face mask on. Sometimes fat fk in a red shirt. Changes by the venue.
(Always a red shirt now though: to keep "on brand")

My friend was a fat fk: he did a desk job (engineer) for a federal contractor building thermo nuclear submarines, which were billed as regular fission submarines. He died at 37 of a blood clot to the lungs.

Here we have:
1) Big change in personality
2) Change in apperance, and masks used

How do we know he's not dead? My friend was like him and is dead. RMS gets to be a fat fk forever and we don't question any of this when his personality changes along with his apperance?

Old RMS would have sued Grsecurity.
What is new RMS?
How do we know that RMS today isn't just a product?

With a twinkle in his eye and a skip in his step, RMS slammed his sky-blue Chevette's rusted-out car door and turned on heel toward the MIT Zoo entrance. Today was a Sunday, and RMS had decided the daily stresses of Free Software, the GPL, and his crazy drug-smoking habits could go away for just one afternoon while he enjoyed the zoo.

"That'll be twenty-five dollars, sir," the lady at the admission booth said glumly. She looked at RMS expectantly.

"I was expecting this zoo to be Free," RMS stated loudly, eyes darting around to gauge onlookers' reactions. There were none: RMS's capital F had went unnoticed. "Can you ensure me that this money will not help fund..."

The admissions lady cut him off. "Twenty-five dollars, or twenty bucks with a Bawls can," the lady cut in.

With a grumble and shake of his beard, RMS handed over twenty five of his hard-earned dollars. Considering that the GPL works to unemploy programmers, one must wonder where this money came from.

By evening, RMS found himself in front of the penguin exhibit. He felt himself start to sweat, which would have been no surprise-his thick, full, grizzly beard was worth a thousand down comforters-except that he was wearing only a pair of nylon biking shorts and a travel pack around his waist. He stared at his hands. What was wrong?

"Awk" a nearby bird squawked. RMS wheeled in the direction the screech had come from. He was met with the steely, unfeeling stares of a penguin. "Awk! Ooooh God, the penguin said awk... Lord, lord lord, it's GNU/Linux. The penguin is Tux!!!" RMS blurted out. He felt dizzy, and cold sweat now washed over his brittle, hairy chest. He looked this way and that. From nearby a bird again squawked.

"Awk! Awk! Awwwwk!!!"

RMS ran as fast as his atrophied hippie-programmer legs could carry him, right through a gate and into an exhibit. He realized what he had done, and before he could turn around, he heard a low, ominous sound. Like the Devil's riding mower.

"Moooooooooooooooo!"

RMS gasped and darted his eyes around him as he stood deathly still.

"MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"

RMS was standing in the Gnu section, and it seemed these bull yaks were in rut and ready to mate with the first hairy thing with a hole in its center they found. Bad luck for RMS and his beard. Just then he felt cloven hooves push him down, and the world became fuzzy. RMS blacked out and remembered no more.

Alice was the type of girl all the girls and boys wanted. She had lovely golden blond hair, big blue eyes, and a perfect body. To make matters worse, she knew she was beautiful, and used it to her advantage whenever she could. She was used to getting her way, and it had made her rather spoiled. This particular spring afternoon, she was relaxing on a bench, in the shade of a small oak tree. She removed her boots and socks, and ran her feet through the cool grass. She closed her eyes and breathed deep. She didn't care that she had still some alchemy work to do. That was for later. Just then, she heard movement around her. She opened her eyes in time to see a white rabbit dart out of the bushes, grab her left shoe, and race back into the underbrush.

"Come back here!" Alice said, quickly getting to her feet. She ran after the rabbit, following it into the bushes.

Alice was running as quick as she could, trying to follow the rabbit. Suddenly, where there was once thick bushes, Alice saw a large clearing with a gaping hole in the middle. She tried to stop but her momentum carried her forward and she fell into the hole.

Alice screamed as she fell and she closed her eyes expecting to hit bottom at any moment. When she realized she had stopped moving, she opened her eyes. She was laying on her back in the middle of a large room. There was no sign of the hole she had fallen through.

She got up and looked around. The only exit was a small door that Alice didn't think she'd fit through. Alice peeked through the door and saw tall green grass on the other side of the door. Beyond the tall grass was a deep, dark forest.

Alice was completely disoriented. She was trying very hard to quell the sinking feeling in her stomach. She had no idea where she was or how she was going to get home.

Alice took a deep breath, got down on all fours, and began to work her way to what lay on the other side of the door. She was half way through when she got stuck. Hard as she tried, Alice couldn't get through and she couldn't back up.

That was the last straw. Alice began to cry. She hadn't cried in a long time. She cried great big tears of frustration and madness, moaning as she did so. If she had been back home, she would've been embarrassed to be seen crying so hard. The problem was, she wasn't back home. She didn't know where she was. Just then, Alice heard footsteps. Out from the grass stepped an old lady, who looked at Alice and said, "There, there, dear. Are you stuck?"

"Yes." Alice replied, wiping a tear from her eye.

The woman kneeled beside Alice and said, "I know just what will get you unstuck." With that, the woman took a spoon and a bottle of liquid out of the apron she was wearing, and tried to give Alice a spoonful.

"No, really, I- Umf!" Alice's protest was cut off as the woman forced the spoon into Alice`s mouth. After a couple of spoonfuls, Alice felt very woozy. Noticing this, the woman put the spoon away and began to feed Alice directly from the bottle. Alice took big, deep gulps, and felt even more lightheaded.

Then Alice realized she had to pee. Not fully aware of her situation, Alice let herself go and peed her pants. Then she took a few more gulps from the old lady's bottle, and realized she was growing smaller. Soon she could easily fit through the door. When she crawled through, the old lady said, "My dear, you've peed in your pants!" Alice just sat there in her sodden jeans and smiled.

"Does my baby have to poo poo?" The lady cooed.

Alice nodded yes, and the woman helped her to her feet. Alice was the size of a ten year old, but she retained her shapely sixteen year old magician of the city form. Alice grunted, and the old lady watched as the butt of Alice's jeans expanded until they were ready to burst.

"They always seem to do that when they first get a taste of my shrinking formula." The old lady said to herself. "Let's get my baby home and into some nice big diapers, where you belong." Said the old woman.

Alice smiled and was led by the hand down a small path through some bamboo woods to large, old-fashioned Japanese mansion .Once inside, Alice's dirty clothes were removed, she was bathed, cleaned, and diapered. Then the old lady placed Alice in a big crib, in a small room just off the main room. Alice fell right to sleep.

"There you are." The woman said with a gleam in her eye. "I know just how to care for babies like you."

When Alice awoke, she couldn't remember where she was. She sat up and looked around, then noticed she was in a large crib. When Alice realized this, she tried to scream, but the large pacifier that was in her mouth kept her from making a sound. Alice pulled back the covers and nearly fainted. She was clad in nothing but three thick flannel diapers, fastened by two oversized safety pins. The diapers were so thick she couldn't even touch her knees together.

Alice struggled to stand up, but the bulk around her waist made it impossible. She could barely get to her knees. She began to cry again. The door opened, and in walked the old lady. She was carrying a bottle full of milk, and she was smiling slyly. "Oh, did my little girl finally wake up?" The old woman wiped a tear off Alice's cheek. "It's so nice to have some OTHER company, someone to care for." The old lady smiled She looked forward to taking care of Alice.

"I bet my baby's hungry. Let's get you something to eat." The woman removed Alice's pacifier, and quickly shoved the bottle into Alice's open mouth. Alice tried to speak, but the flow of liquid was so quick, all she could do was drink. After the bottle was gone, Alice felt like she was going to burst. The woman helped her out of the crib, and onto a nearby table. There, Alice was dressed in pink fluffy rumba pants, ankle socks, and Mary Jane shoes. Lastly, the old lady put a short pink dress on Alice. Alice was once again helped to her feet. When she looked down, Alice realized that the dress didn't even come close to covering her well padded rear end. There was no hiding the fact that Alice was well diapered.

Finally, Alice had the chance to speak. "Who are you? What's going on, why am I dressed like this?" Tears began to well up in Alice's eyes. "Don't cry, dearie. You can call me Eirin. You're dressed like this because when I found you, you had completely soiled your dress. That's unacceptable. If you're going to act like a baby, I shall treat you like one."

"But I'm not a baby." Alice began.

"No excuses. What's your name, little girl?" Eirin asked.

"Alice." Alice replied.

"Well Alice, we're going to see the queen of Gensokyo. I've been invited to her tea party and it looks like you'll be joining me." Nanny took Alice by the hand, and began to lead her to the main room.

"Not like this! I can't go out like this!" Alice tried to pull away, but Eirin was strong for an older lady. She sat Alice down in a large stroller, and strapped her in tight.

"Off we go!" said Nanny, as she pushed Alice out the front door, and down a little bamboo path.

They weren't far down the path when Alice realized she had to pee. She told Nanny, who just smiled and said, "That's what diapers are for, little girl."

Alice tried to hold it in. After a while, she was squirming in her stroller, pressing her hand against her crotch, and trying to avoid the inevitable. Finally, it was too much. Her bladder gave way, letting out a little at first, then slowly Alice soaked her diapers.

Eirin knew what had happened, but continued to push Alice along in the stroller. "I don't want to be late. I'll change you when we get to Mayohiga"

As they moved slowly down the path, Alice moved around constantly, trying to get comfortable. She began to fiddle with the harness. Unbeknownst to Eirin, Alice worked the harness loose.

Further down the path, Nanny stopped to check if she took the right way. Alice saw her chance to escape. She threw off her harness, jumped out of the stroller, and began to waddle away in to the thick growing bamboo.

"Come back!" Eirin shouted, and began to run after Alice. Alice was slowed by the unusual bulk of her diapers, and Eirin was right on her heels until she tripped on a rock, and Alice waddled deeper in to the forest. After a long time, Alice finally stopped to catch her breath. She didn't see any sign of Eirin. She smiled a faint smile and tried to think of what to do next.

Alice soon had to poop, and there was no way she was going to do that in her diapers. She tried to remove her panties, to get at her diapers, but found they were locked tight. She struggled a few more minutes, before deciding it was useless. She decided to walk, hoping to take her mind of the fact that she was about to take a giant step back into infancy.

She kept walking until the pain in her bowels forced her to stop. She was in a clearing in the forest. She looked around, and made sure she was alone. Alice figured this was as good a place as any to relieve herself. She stood with her legs spread, and her upper body bent over slightly. She rested her hands on her knees, let out a deep, anguished sigh, and prepared to let nature take its course.

Just as she began to go, a voice behind her said, "Watcha doin?"

Alice turned around slowly, having to keep her feet far apart. Her diapers began to sag with the weight of Alice's bowel movement. She didn't know what to say. She was looking down at a small bug, but it was unlike any insect Alice had ever seen. It had a face, with eyes and a mouth, a pair of feelers and wings that looked like a fluttering cape. It was almost human in appearance. It spoke again.

"Come look what I found!" It shouted into the forest.

From all around her, Alice heard movement from the forest. Suddenly, dozens of bugs identical to the one below her appeared in the clearing around Alice. She was still pooping, and the panties began to balloon out as Alice continued to involuntarily fill her diapers.

"It's a baby. A big baby, but surely a baby none the less. Look at it!" Said all the bugs at the same time.

Finally, Alice was finished. Her diapers were completely full, and Alice finally found her voice. "I.. am.. not a baby." Alice whimpered. She tried to walk normally, but her diapers wouldn't let her.

"She's a baby! A big baby!" The bugs began to laugh at her.

"I am not!" Alice fought back tears. She began to waddle away from the clearing, the laughing of the bugs following her. She tripped over a root, and landed on all fours. She started to crawl, just like a baby, crying out loud as she went. She turned to see if the bugs were following her, but all she could see was her huge 12-bolt rear end.

She got to her feet, and started to waddle forward again. She looked back over her shoulder, and saw nothing. She turned around and once again caught her foot on a big root. She tumbled forward, rolled, and landed on her butt. She slid down a muddy hill on her big backside, screaming as she went. At the bottom of the hill, she splashed in to a mud puddle.

Alice sat in shock for a few seconds. She looked down at herself, and was dismayed at what she saw. Her dress was dirty, her face and hands were streaked with mud, and worst of all she was sitting in soiled diapers, squishing the uncomfortable mess all around her backside.

"I wanna go home!" Alice cried. She didn't care if she was acting like a baby. She had pooped her diapers, peed in them, and was completely muddy. Alice didn't know what was going on, but she knew she didn't like it.

Alice sat awhile, not sure what to do. Finally, she slowly got to her feet, and began to waddle forward. She climbed back up through the brush, careful to avoid the slippery sections that would send her sliding back down into the puddle.

When she got to the top of the hill, she saw no sign of the bugs. She walked slowly, using little baby steps because her diapers were incredibly uncomfortable, being as they were so full. Alice had gone only a short distance, when a voice called out, "Why, hellooo there, little girl!"

Alice looked around, but couldn't tell where the voice had come from. "Hello?" Alice asked, somewhat confused, somewhat scared.

"Up here, in the trees." The voice said again.

Alice looked up and saw a girl with cat ears and two tails, sitting in the branch of a nearby tree. "What a lovely pink dress ya got, my dear." It said. Then, in the blink of an eye, it disappeared from the tree, and reappeared at Alice's side.

"Who are you?" Alice asked.

"I'm the cat. Name's Rin. Who are ya?" The cat cooed.

"I'm Alice. I don't usually dress like this. In fact, I've never dressed like this. You see, this weird old lady gave me something to drink. It made me smaller, then she put me in diapers, locked me in diapers, actually. I'm back to normal size now, but I'm still in diapers, and this dress is way too revealing." Alice said.

The cat girl looked her up and down, from her long lean legs, leading up to her well-padded rear, and up to her tight fitting baby dress. "I dunno, I kinda like the dress." Rin said, and smiled with a huge grin.

"Can you help me, please? I don't know what to do. I've got to find Eirin, and get out of these diapers. They're um, used, if you know what I mean." Alice said sheepishly.

"I could smell that from the treetop." Said the cat girl. "I suppose I might be able to help you out. Eirin and my master are on good terms."

"You know her?" Alice blurted out.

"Little girls shouldn't interrupt." Said the cat. He stuck the pacifier that hung around Alice's neck into her mouth, and said, "Follow me."

Just as Alice was beginning to get up, she suddenly found herself unable to move; the cat girl in front of her had also frozen.

"What's going on---" she started, before realizing that she could no longer speak, and was merely attempting to speak with her thoughts. The next moment, the scene in front of her was speckled with multicolored pixels like a video card with defective VRAM, and a loud pop resonated in the surroundings, followed by a series of ominous hissing and crackling sounds. The distinctive pungent smell of burnt phenolic resin and capacitor electrolyte permeated the air around her. "Oh shit," she thought to herself when her view turned into a BSOD speckled with multicolored pixels.

"Get me out of here!" she shouted within herself, then saw everything fade into blackness before catching a glimpse of the words "Check signal cable" in large pixelated text.

"Alice? Can you hear me? Alice? Are you alright?"

When she regained consciousness, she heard the voice of a middle-aged man approaching her, and the weight of her headgear and restraints began to reappear in her senses. Opening her eyes, she saw the Windows XP loading screen, which was soon replaced by the familiar desktop. The man unfastened and removed the apparatus she was connected to, and soon she found herself sitting in the chair just as it was before the experiment began. The smell from earlier was still lingering in the air.

"Sorry about that. The power supply burned out," the man, who was wearing a white labcoat, said while pointing to one of the computers which was being serviced by another technician.

"When will I get to test the Reality Engine again? That was fun, until it crashed." Alice told him.

"Sorry, it's going to be out of commission for the next few hours at least. You can come again tomorrow. But for now, you can spend the remaining time filling out this survey of your experiences --- up until the point it stopped working."

The lab assistant handed Alice a thick pile of forms and a pencil. Although she enjoyed the experience, she hesitated and blushed at the embarrassing thought of describing it, and desperately hoped the others in the lab didn't notice her expression.

"Don't worry about telling us what you did in there. Remember, your reality is also our reality. We know everything already, we just want to see your views on it," one of them commented a short while later, making Alice almost jump up at the shock.

When she was done, she rose from her chair and walked over to where professor Stallman was sitting next to the server rack.

"Thank you for participating in our study today. We hope you understand that you have made a valuable contribution to the GNU Project," he told her as she handed him the papers. Alice still had time remaining until her next class, but decided to spend it outside instead of in the stuffy hallways of the CSAIL building, and briskly exited.

"Alice! How was it?" she heard a voice calling her from behind. When she turned around, standing there was Eva Luator, another student in her 6.001 class.

"It was really weird," Alice replied sheepishly, then quickly changing the topic to avoid being questioned on it further, "did you finish the problem set?"

"I did, but it was really hard. Fortunately, Grun agreed to help me with it," she replied.

"Grun?" Alice asked.

"Grun Ur, he's in our class. He's from Japan and is really good at understanding this stuff. He also sleeps all the time in 6.001 because he finds it boring."

"Wow, I want to ask him a few things later too! To be honest, I really don't know how I got into MIT."

The two girls continued happily talking in the courtyard, with Alice completely unaware of the plan they had unknowingly assisted in.

...

"And for next time, remember your problem sets are due. Be sure to read SICP," Professor Gerald Jay Sussman spoke as the class prepared to leave.

"He's over there," Eva pointed while saying to Alice, "he doesn't usually leave that quickly so you can go ask him if you move fast enough."

Alice rapidly weaved her way between the exiting students and arrived at where Eva pointed --- sitting in one of the seats was an Asian male preparing to leave, but a pink-haired girl seemed to already be talking to him.

"You there! You obviously know the material so well you could fall asleep in class from hearing it again! Want to help me with the homework? I'm Amu Hinamori. I'm in first-year computer science," Alice heard her say.

"I'm... I'm Grun Ur," he replied nervously.

"Do you have a class after this?"

"No... I'm going---"

"Perfect! You can come with me to the library," Amu said excitedly and started walking out towards the aisle. He followed her slowly, for some reason covering his crotch with a notebook.

"E-Excuse me," Alice timidly tried to say, but he didn't notice her and simply walked out.

"I didn't see her talking to him before," Eva told Alice.

"I'll talk to him next time then," Alice replied.

A Cat Is Fine Too

A BSD Is Fine Too

A VMS Is Fine Too