my adult life

People my age are settling down and getting married. I'm still a kissless virgin. Just the other day an old friend that I knew back in high school has married his gf. I found out after stalking him on the internet. Yes, I stalk people on the internet. I can feel the noose getting tighter and tighter. My testosterone level is getting lower and lower. I'm getting overly emotional like a woman now.

I work in a hospital. I see the young nurses and it makes me so horny and depressed. But, many of them already have boyfriends. I learned that the hard and embarrassing way. I tried to talk to them. Yes, it's completely over for me oh God just send a bolt of thunder on me and kill me. I can see their faces cringe when I try to talk to them. As a result, I end up cringing at myself and the conversation ends there because I can't continue after that.

I've since stopped because I could lose my job if I keep doing such stupid things. I think it's time to check out of this world. I will order some fentanyl and overdose on it. It's obvious that my genetics are not desirable. I can't live to old age. It would be a crime. It's cowardly. It's pathetic. I can't do it. I don't want to do it.

>>1
Do you have any actual (so no video gaymes, manchild franchises and such shit) hobbies, passions? Do you have any real-life skills, besides those required by your job? Some people design and build machines and electronics on their own, others grab metal detectors and hunt for treasures in the ground, craft RC models, photograph nature, perform their own scientific research or even create art like music, paintings, sculptures, etc. But simply reading (good, not trash like most current bestsellers) books, playing chess (with full competitive ruleset) or even collecting postage stamps are all a good to make one's life worthwhile. Do you know any foreign languages?

Do you keep your body in proper condition? Do you wash yourself often, either completely shave your facial hair or keep it tidy, have some proper haircut on your head? I hope all the answers are positive. If not, you have to fix your physique first. Do I have to tell you, that you should keep your house/room clean and tidy (and free from kitsch as well as consoomer trash).

The above for start, you should also stop being obsessed over having sex. It exists to prolong the existence of mankind and as such is important, but today it's just being fetishized. There is nothing wrong with being a virgin (school jokes aside), being an incel is another story. Though incels are pathetic not because the lack of sex, they're pathetic because of their thirst, creepiness and obsessiveness (as well, as stereotypes being attached to them, that are true in most cases). If you are into porn, stop it, because it only keeps degenerating you further. If you are too weak, check NoFap.

Do you live alone, with some roommates or with your family? If you dwell in a basement, it's just as living alone - time to return to the surface, back to the world of the alive beings. You may have to re-learn normal human interactions. First, throw off that stupid bullshit that you cant talk to a girl just like you talk to a male friend. Talk about normal things, if you are asking someone out on first conversation, you can only achieve epic fail. Marriage and family are mature things that require patience and responsibility, if you lack it while starting, don't even bother. Some couples married after few years of knowing each other.

You can have a worthwhile life, even as a virgin. Just don't be a fatass neckbeard manchild weebtard, don't dwell in basement, don't dive into consoomerism, "nerd culture" or other bullshit, don't be a pervert of any kind. Use computers an the Internet as tools (because that's what they are) and live in the real life. Don't engage into political bullshit unless you can dig the sources and analyse them yourself, and even then, don't waste too much energy on it (remember, all this spectacle isn't really for you, but for them, regardless of political side, party - they want you to play your role, for their benefit).