Proposal: poastlang, Turing-complete shitposts

poastlang is a new systems programming language that uses repetitive shitposts and meme phrases as language constructs. A simple database, which may be maintained separately from any implementation in a distributed manner, maps memes to syntax trees with a pattern matching DSL. The frontend compiler uses state of the art NLP to deduce shitposts from context where possible. poastlang core is thus virtually syntax-free and future proof by design.

Example:

hax my anus
check em
until I FUCKING LOVE Jews

roughly translates to the following C code:
#include <stdio.h>
int main() {
int i = 0;
for(;; i++) {
if((i%100)%11 == 0) {
printf("%d\n", i);
}
}
return 0;
}

you should of coded in python if you need help with that project

How does one lang ````roughly'''' translate into another?

5c5
< if ((i % 100) % 11 == 0) {
---
> if (i != 0 && (i % 100) % 11 == 0) {

Unindent the last line by one, quick fix because the crap parser thinks it's a quote if I don't space it even if it's within code tags.

Where's the spec?

>>5
it's coming when Nikita finishes game

/prog/

>>7
can't start threads on /prog/. admin's shit is fucked up.

>>8
stop lying

>>9
um no sweetie. it said "board doesn't exist" when I tried to start a thread there

>>10
only you, babe, only you

Hi, my name is Matt. I'm a journalist for BuzzFeed. I'm doing a piece on obscure internet communities, and I'm wondering if anyone here would like to reach out for an interview. Our readers are interested in quirky, dated websites like this one which appear to cater to the senior citizen community. You can hit me up on Twitter @mattstopera.

- Matt

>>12
Hi Matt. I am interested in cooperation and I definitely admit my role. Can you email me please.

>>12
I'm gay

>>14
finish yuour game

>>12
I hope your're are incoming piece of investigative journalism will lead to the hamster being avenged!

>>12
Admit your roal, Matt. Your roal has to be admitted.

Ohello /lounge, my name is Chips Handon. I always like to lork at tinycham and I also like mumblenuts too, as you do. DASU DASU LOL. I also like having sex with underage children (HOES DON'T KNOW ABOUT MY DICK), shop the wops, do a battle roll and i just lost the match. Due to the fact that i'm not a noobfag i know that /anus/ is in posession of a great variety of "PC", at least those of you that aren't underage b%. in a nutshell, I need Anomalous to deliver to an Astrafaglian /re/tard some of his "PC" (you know what i mean LOL). ROW ROW ROW THE BOAT. PLEASE DONT MAGE THIS THRED IT IS NOT COPYPIZZA, BUT ORIGINAL COMMENT.

>>18
hi